go do what you do best...puke behind churches
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
So vagazzling was a success
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Randomize
