Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
21 Porn Stars Confess What Sex Is Really Like On Set
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
19 People That Found Pubes In All The Wrong Places
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo