this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
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You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
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