she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
Randomize
