There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
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