we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
