new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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