I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
