I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
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