Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Randomize
