Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
