If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
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