I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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