I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
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