would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT