Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
Randomize
