whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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