Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
I want to make a zoo with you.
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I'm getting married
To pizza
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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