i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
You asked the waitress for a vasectomy and handed her a butter knife, like you were ordering something from the menu
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize