Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
