Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
Randomize
