and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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