I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
Randomize