I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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