Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
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