You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
Randomize
