my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
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