i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
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