You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Randomize
