I feel great
I just peed on a car
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
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Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
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