Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
Randomize
