on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
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