Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
