You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
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