you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
Randomize
