Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
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