my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
we're so committed to being not committed
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
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