Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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