what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Randomize
