Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
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Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
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