therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
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