And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
I believe in your delicious
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
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