Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
Randomize
