It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
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