I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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