I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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