only if we run a train.
done.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
Green mimosas i think yes
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
Randomize
