Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
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