Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
Randomize
