we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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