So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
I feel like abortions should bother me more
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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